How to Deal With a Wife Who is in Contact With Other Men
Question: He says that he has discovered his wife's infidelity through her mobile phone, as she has been in contact with strange men. They have two children together, and he remains uncertain about what to do. He also states that this has happened repeatedly, leaving him unsure whether he is in a dream or lost in confusion. He is on the verge of collapse. What is the ruling in the Shari'ah on this matter, and what do you advise him to do?
Sheikh Fatḥ Al-Qadasi ḥafidhahullāh:
If it has been confirmed that his wife is involved in relationships with strange men, then there is no good in her. She may continue communicating with them until she betrays him with the ultimate betrayal (i.e. Zina). Such a woman has no good in her as she is has not remained faithful to her husband in his absence; rather, she has betrayed him. There is also a serious concern that she could bring into his household children who are not his.
Thus, may Allāh bless you, he has no option but to separate from her—especially if the suspicion has grown stronger and he has reason to believe that she meets with them or sends them pictures or other inappropriate things. This would indicate that she is prepared to engage in immoral acts, may Allāh protect us. This is assuming that such acts have not already taken place.
A woman like this will ruin his children’s upbringing and betray him in terms of intimacy. Therefore, I advise him to separate from her, and Allāh is the One who grants help. She is the one who has destroyed her own household and brought this upon herself. He should seek a righteous wife who will remain loyal to him in his absence, and Allāh will not forsake him if he leaves something for His sake.
If it was merely a one off message or a momentary lapse instigated by Shayṭān, without any persistence, and she has realised her mistake and sincerely repented, then as a form of discipline, her mobile phone may be taken away to prove the sincerity of her claim that it was a momentary slip and that she will not repeat it. This applies if it was just a one off message or the receipt of a message from an unfamiliar man without further involvement.
However, if there has been persistent communication, including messages, pictures, and other such disgraceful acts, then she has become morally compromised. She will not only harm herself but also her husband, their children, and their entire family. Such behaviour will bring a bad reputation upon them and ultimately lead to the destruction of their home. And Allāh is the One Whose aid is sought.
Source:
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