Dear Fyodor,
I was scared of getting better because I was afraid it would be too much like changing. But at some point I had no other way but to either go down the abyss or go up the road, and I couldn't have fallen down. I had to hang on for the sake of those I love.
So I changed. I don't know if I actually changed or I'm just different because I finally learned to take things easier and to live more freely cause life by itself is hard enough that it doesn't leave you enough room to take it even harder; If you do, there's nothing but darkness ahead.
I just learned to see the things I had forgotten about in a new light. To some, this may look like changing but to me it's more like growing than becoming a whole new person.
I think I'm happy about it. My mind's too busy worrying about how others are taking it that I can't really grasp my own feelings but I consider all this to be a good thing happening and I'm content. Isn't that enough to be happy about, then?
P.S. I got a houseplant named Maria. She looks so beautiful in the sunlight, it makes me smile every morning.